I found another word I used way too often. All.
A lot of times I just didn’t need it, and those extra Alls were cluttering up my manuscript. Below are my examples from the Proper Way to Say Goodbye.
-Read the story and give me all your comments and suggestions.
(What, did she think Chloe was only going to give her the first 2 comments and not the rest?)
-You know, your mom might be worried about you being all alone.
(Hmmm. Is all alone like way worse than just alone?)
-I jumped to my feet and threw all my stuff into my backpack as my tears thickened.
(She’s about to run, why wouldn’t she throw it all in?)
-But he wouldn’t ignore me, and we’d all have a fun time.
(She’s talking about 3 people. Why do I need all?)
-I appreciate all the extra time you’ve put in for me to get this done.
(So if I take out all, would that mean she only appreciated half of the extra time?)
So I deleted about 80 Alls. One thing I did was to leave the All in for Chloe’s voice. But with the other characters, I took it out.
December 21, 2012 by Suzi