Title: The Proper Way to Say Goodbye
Genre: Contemporary Young Adult
Word Count: 66,000 words
Only one person knew Chloe was gay, and his love and support disappeared when he hung a noose around his neck. And jumped.
Eighteen-year-old Chloe attends the college where her brother Brock spent his final days, hoping to uncover the reason behind his death. His whispers often invade her mind, and she can’t bear to tell anyone how he died. Or that she likes girls.
She soon finds Murphy—a boy who totally gets the wrong idea about their friendship because Chloe refuses to tell him the truth, afraid of losing his support when she needs it the most. And Sasha, her gorgeous young teacher, who reveals Brock was sexually abused as a child. Even after Sasha gives her his journals, Chloe still can’t figure out what pushed him over the edge.
Brock’s plan for revenge against his molester consumes Chloe, and her depression deepens. She pushes away the important people in her life and begins to stalk the one girl who might have the answer: Brock’s former girlfriend who is the daughter of his abuser. But Chloe’s obsession comes at a cost, and she might have to give up everything she’s ever wanted—her girlfriend, her best friend, and her sanity, in order to discover Brock’s final secret.
First 250 words:
The biggest thing I had in common with my older brother, Brock, was that we both liked girls. Two months after he killed himself, his whispers still invaded my mind. I didn’t need a therapist to tell me it wasn’t really Brock talking. I wasn’t mental.
Usually his words comforted me, but other times they annoyed me.
Each step I took up the stairwell, my nerves grew exponentially. It’s only book club, I repeated.
Cricket’s got a crush, Brock’s voice teased.
I rolled my eyes at his comment and the stupid nickname he used to call me, but he was right. In a few minutes, I’d see her for the first time outside of class.
Beautiful long blonde hair, gorgeous full red lips, and a big chest to match. Perfection in every way. Unfortunately, she was also my Freshman Composition teacher. Teaching assistant technically, so she couldn’t be more than a few years older than me. Not that it mattered.
I could imagine the horror on her face if she found out I liked her. She wouldn’t laugh it off like she did with the guys in class who lusted over her.
A female student—yeah, that’d trip her out.
Nobody knew I was gay. Not here at college. Not at home. Brock took that secret to the grave when the noose snapped his neck.
Tomorrow is the start of the A to Z blog challenge. For those who don’t know, it is a post for each letter of the alphabet every day in April. Except Sundays. When I checked last, there were just under 1500 participants. It’s huge.
So for the month of April, I won’t be doing my Big Reveal or Sloppy Writing postings. It’ll get to be too much. They will return in May.
And I look forward to visiting other A to Z participants.
One other thing I wanted to mention. I just participated in Brenda Drake’s PitchMadness this past week and was lucky enough to get 2 requests. It is one of many contests put on by writers.
And I just wanted to give a shout out to all those writer/bloggers who do these terrific contests, bringing writers and agents together. They look like a ton of work and often take many volunteers to organize them.
Here are some of the blogs that host regular contests.
Cupid’s Literary Connection
Miss Snark’s First Victim
Krista Van Dolzer
I’m sure there are more, but these are the ones I’m familiar with. So thank you to all these bloggers for freely giving their time and effort.
And see you tomorrow for the A to Z.
Thank you to Cupid at Cupid’s Literary Connection for hosting the Blind Speed Dating Contest. Here’s my kissing scene entry.
THE PROPER WAY TO SAY GOODBYE
Setup: About 2/3 way through the story. Chloe (age 18) and Sasha (21) have just returned from visiting Chloe’s best friend, where she revealed for the first time (to anyone) that she is gay and that Sasha is her girlfriend. Now they are in Chloe’s room, and it’s the first time she will be sleeping in a bed with Sasha.
“Are you sure this is all right?” she asked. Her tank top hugged her breasts, both exciting and terrifying me. I needed new pajamas. Ratty t-shirts and shorts wouldn’t cut it anymore.
“I promise to stay on my side.” Her grin reassured me, and she tugged the hair band off one of her braids. Then the second. She grabbed the braid to unwind it.
“Wait.” My mind spun a hundred different directions. Would she think I was weird?
She didn’t say a word as I scooted over—my knees barely touching her back. I took hold of one braid and slowly unwound it. Then the second. The scent of Sasha—her sweet peach lotion, filled my nose as I spread my fingers through her silky hair like I’d always wanted to. I could sit like this all night long but stopped, worried again she’d think I was strange.
Sasha twisted around and placed her hand on my cheek. Her fingers burned a tender trail down to my chin, and I wanted to freeze this moment, to gaze into her deep blue eyes forever.
Eyes that understood me. That accepted me. That wanted me.
Her hand gripped my neck, and her lips welcomed mine, making me feel like the only thing that mattered. Like I never wanted to breathe so I could just drink in her lips.
Sasha pulled back; her sigh resonated deep inside of me. Her fingers squeezed my knee, and even though she wore only a small smile, her eyes said she was feeling everything I was.
She turned away, but I didn’t want this to end. I pressed my body into hers, wrapping my arms around her waist and resting my chin on her shoulder.
Her smooth hands caressed mine. Those first days in class, I’d thought Sasha was perfect. She wasn’t. And I wasn’t either.
But this was… perfect.
“I love you, Chloe.”
Her words hung there, scaring me, but also filling me with a happiness I’d never known. I wanted this—her—more than anything, and I knew the words I would say were true.
“I love you too.”
That’s it. So go to Cupid’s site to see more entrants.
I am excited to say that I just got another book to add to my signed book collection.
I won Come See About Me from C.K. Kelley Martin. This will be the first book I’ve read by C.K. CSAM is new adult story that I’ve heard a lot of good things about. Months ago, I stumbled on her website, which was the first time I’d heard about CSAM. The story interested me, but as what often happens, I hadn’t gotten around to buying it yet. (Too many good books out there.)
So that’s why this was really cool to win, and I can’t wait to get into it. C.K. also has several young adult stories, which I will probably check out after I read this one too.
So thank you, C.K.
And thanks also to Danya at A Tapestry of Words, who hosted the guest post and giveaway by C.K. Danya’s blog is a mix of interviews, guest posts and book reviews. And in September she has something interesting coming up.
“Psychtember is back this coming fall (mark your calendars!), and along with it, Dr. Carolyn Kaufman! She’s a clinical psychologist, author of the book The Writer’s Guide to Psychology, and writing coach.”
It looks like if you have any questions about the portrayal of mental health issues, you can submit a question and it might be answered. How cool is that? So check out Danya’s site to learn more and see all the other good stuff she does.
So thank you, Danya.
And I have a third thank you to send out to Kelley York. She chose 6 winners (me included–and yes, I’m lucky) to receive an e-ARC of her new book Hollowed, a paranormal story. I’ve read her book Hushed, and LOVED it, and am looking forward to this one too.
So thank you, Kelley.
Have you read any C.K. Kelley Martin or Kelly York books?
I’ll admit I was a bit lazy. I typed this up the day ahead, and although I’ve got a few other posts I could’ve used, I didn’t feel like using them now.
So instead, I’ll tell you about a couple things I’m excited about.
Remember Christa Desir’s Band Camp flash fiction contest. There is still time to vote on your favorites. And if you come back here next week, I am offering a $10 gift certificate to B&N or Amazon to the one who guesses which is mine. If there is more than one correct person, I’ll draw names.
So come back here next week to guess. Christa’s contest ends July 31st.
Click on any of their sites for more information.
Take a traditional fairy tale and ask what if? Then write a 300 word or less scene that falls into one of four categories: plot twist, tragedy, love story, or comedy.
Each judge is offering a special prize.
I have officially joined Team Plot Twist, judged by Cassie Mae. My story involves Cinderella, but that’s all I’ll say.
It was hard to get it down in 300 words, but mine is written and now I’ll just have to do some editing.
Gearing up to get an agent blogfest/pitch contest in September.
This couldn’t have come at a better time. I’ve sent my manuscript to beta readers. And barring any major changes, I can be ready, or almost ready, by September. This will be a good way to test the waters with my new story.
There is a lot of stuff going on during the month, so clink on the picture above to find out more about Deana’s blogfest.
And this is totally random. My twenty year reunion is next weekend, and I am so excited for it. I’ll get to see some good friends I haven’t seen in ages. Along with all my other classmates I haven’t seen since the 10 year, or before.
So is anybody going to participate in the The Fairy Tale or Gearing up for an Agent blogfest? Or are there any others out there that sound like fun?
Today I wanted to mention a little flash fiction contest I’m participating in. Christa Desir has been collecting entries for her This One Time at Band Camp flash fiction contest.
She is giving away an incredible prize, a gift card and a 10-page critique to the story with the most votes. Very cool.
So since I submitted a piece, I thought it might be fun if the readers on my blog can guess which one is mine. Christa will be posting the band camp stories soon and will leave them up for the month. On July 31st she will announce the winner. So make sure you vote on your favorite.
On July 29th, I’ll do a post on this blog inviting you to guess which was mine. Of the people that guess right, I’ll throw their names into a hat to pick a winner, and that person will receive a $10 gift card to Amazon or Barnes and Noble.
Here is a little blurb from Christa’s site:
Keep in mind that all stories must start with: “This one time at band camp…”
They do NOT have to be true. Although if you want them to be because you have an awesome band camp story, then go for it. You do NOT have to be a writer. Just do it. It’ll be fun and get your creative juices flowing. Stories will be posted ANONYMOUSLY.
So make sure you watch her site for postings. Or check back here, I’ll let you know when they go up.
I’m excited because this is my first attempt at flash fiction. Have you written any or competed in ff contests?
May 17th was the start of the second round of The Writers Voice contest hosted by Krista, Cupid, Monica, and Brenda. TWV had 200 entries and I figured myself lucky just to get in. But then Cupid chose me to be on her team of ten + one alternate. What an honor.
So this last week, we got a look at all our teammates queries and first pages. We got comments, then revised. Then comments. Then revised. (Some of us at least.) With any critique, you don’t agree with everything, but I made a lot of great changes from their comments and really appreciated the help.
Now I’m sure that everyone believes they have the best team, but I just wanted to show you why we really are the best. And I apologize because I won’t be able to do these stories justice, so make sure to go to Cupid’s site to read their query and first page yourself. (Keep in mind I haven’t read any of these, I’m just pulling my description together from what I’ve read of their query.)
Dahlia with Behind the Scenes, a contemporary young adult novel about a girl who works for her celebrity best friend. But when the publicists decide they want the celebrity friend to “date” her co-star, the guy the girl’s just begun seeing, she needs to decide what means more: her best friend, her future and her shot at love.
Favorite line: She’d had an audition that morning for a teen dramedy show, and despite having been in plenty of movies, she was more desperate to land the role of Ditz #3 on Daylight Falls than she’d been to play Brad-freakin’-Pitt’s stepdaughter three years ago.
Melanie with Dazed and Knights, a young adult romance novel where a girl goes back in time and has to deal with a spoiled princess, a handsy lord and no toilets! But of course there’s a knight in shining armour and she must decided if she wants to stay or try return home.
Favorite lines: Staring at the back of his head, I imagined lightning bolts shooting from my eyes and frying that perfect blond hair. I could almost hear the sizzle.
Ann with Supertastic ScienceGirls, a middle grade novel about a girl who discovers her parents are involved in this super secret experiment and she ends up in danger from the people who want to stop it. They attempt to kidnap her, but she and her Scientastic SuperGirls club won’t let that happen.
Favorite line: We’ve found ourselves a sub loonier than the lady who walked on tiptoes and only talked about leprechauns.
LeighAnn with One, a young adult sci-fi novel about a girl who doesn’t fit in. She has one power, whereas everybody else has either two powers OR none. But when she discovers a boy, a one, they realize together they have both powers. Except that somebody doesn’t want to see that happen and kidnaps the boy. But rescuing him might be the end to her chance to develop her two powers and she must decide what to do.
Favorite lines: I’m a One – a half-superpowered freak. It’s the same sad story for all of us.
Kelsey with But Not for Me, a contemporary young adult novel with a girl who is constantly bullied and teased. She’s tremendously overweight, is labeled as a special ed kid, and just got a new step-sister who’s making her life hell. When she gets a chance to shine, but is pushed back down by her fellow classmates, she must decide if she will take charge of her life or remain the girl everyone thinks she is.
Favorite lines: I hate buttoning my jeans. I would rather skip straight to the inevitable muumuu phase of my life than try to encapsulate my size 20 ass into this denim prison ever again.
Derek with Stealing the Sun, a sci fi novel about a notorious space pirate who is not only trying to escape from his past, but from the people who want him dead.
Favorite line: Yep, Trig thought, he was pretty well nerfed.
Amy Rose with Burnout, a contemporary young adult novel about a drag-racing girl, her deceitful ex-best friend, and the boy the girl is falling for. And it all takes place in the underground world of illegal street racing.
Favorite lines: Hello, Universe. Callie White here, future professional drag racer extraordinaire. 10.5 seconds is what I need. 10.5 is what I’ll get. Just try and stop me. I dare you.
MarcyKate with Monstrous, a fantasy young adult novel where the murdered girl is brought back to life by her father, except she looks like a monster. As she’s trying to save innocents from being murdered, she’s falling for a boy who hasn’t seen her hideous self, and she’s trying to figure out who the real monster is: her father, the wizard who murdered her, or herself.
Favorite line: When I opened my eyes, the colors of the world swarmed me, filling up all space with hues and objects for which I had no name.
Becky with Here Comes the Sun, a contemporary young adult novel about an often-teased girl who gets to go to England on a school trip. She meets a boy, a Beetles fanatic, and hopefully he will help her learn to break free from her shell and that life doesn’t always suck.
Favorite line: So here I am, flying so damn high in the sky that Chicago looks like Lego City, crossing my legs so tight that they are literally tingling from the pressure.
Cortney with Phobic, a young adult horror novel where the main character realizes that the house she is living in is alive and that she is physically connected to it. And if she doesn’t figure out the truth behind the house, she may just permanently become a part of it.
Favorite lines: When I was six years old I found the man my mother murdered stuffed under a trap door in our kitchen. The smell gave him away.
And here’s my Frosty.
And thank you once again to our fearless leader, Cupid! Not only has she helped with our query and first page, but she critiqued some additional pages too. I can’t thank her enough!
So go check out all the entries to see some great stories. Sunday is the last day to leave comments, then Monday the agents will stop by.
So there are so many blog hops and contests going on, I’ve kinda gotten out of schedule. I’ve skipped Sloppy Writing two times, but will get back this week.
I also have a WIP Coaching post, which I’ll get to next week, because I had my last Skype session with Gabriela. And now it’s up to me to do some more work.
I’m going to use today just to say thanks to a few people. I’ve been pretty lucky the last few weeks and have won a few blog contests. I’m not sure why it hits all at once, but it did.
Amy Sonnichsen was celebrating her almost 300th follower (I think she’s at 319 last time I checked) and her birthday. I was randomly picked to win a 10 page ms critique, which I will be sending her sometime soon. So thank you, Amy.
Blog Hops are so much fun—I’m just learning this. I’ve only participated in a few, but have sighed up for more. The Dust It Off Blog hop is going on now, the Oh those High School Dances on May 9th, the First Loves Blogfest on May 14th and then the First Fight/First Kiss Blogfest on June 12th/14th. Whew-lots to prepare.
But anyway, last week was the Oh! My Hero Blop Hop hosted by Jaycee and Victoria, who picked me as her winner. Yay! My prize was a book and I picked WITH OR WITHOUT YOU by Brian Farrey. So now I’ve got another book on my Kindle to read. So thank you to Victoria.
Lastly but not least, Christa Desir had an interview with K.M. Walton author of CRACKED and she gave away a copy, which I won. (once again randomly chosen.) Make sure you check out Christa’s site too because her book TRAINWRECK is coming out in 2013 and it sounds fascinating. So thank you Christa too.
As I said, I’ve been lucky these last few weeks, so thank you to everyone.
The next big thing is The Writer’s Voice contest, which started last week. I was lucky to get in as the spots filled up fast, and it’ll be fun to see what happens. My entry for FROSTY is a few posts down. And check out any of these ladies sites to see how The Writer’s Voice Contest works: Krista, Cupid, Monica, and Brenda.
The Writer’s Voice Entry #97
Genre: Contemporary Young Adult
Word Count: 52,000 words
Sometimes you have to freeze everyone out to avoid getting burned.
Sydney’s had seven foster families in seven years. Almost everybody in her life has let her down, including her crack addicted mother. Sydney refuses to get close to anyone, pushing away those who attempt to befriend her. Now she is moving on to her next family, the Claytons. She knows immediately that she won’t fit in with their extravagant life and their spoiled daughter Brooke.
Sydney resents the snobby kids at her new school, especially Brooke’s boyfriend Corbin. Sydney thinks Corbin is just like all the other overprivileged kids; but he’s hot and she can’t help being attracted to him, even as she hates him. When Sydney finds Brooke and another girl naked on the floor, she learns that Corbin is helping keep their secret in exchange for Brooke’s help. Sydney’s frozen exterior begins to thaw when Corbin admits he can hardly read or write—the reason why Brooke is helping him.
Corbin likes Sydney, but Brooke refuses to let him go because she is terrified that everyone will discover she’s gay. But even if Brooke breaks up with Corbin, Sydney doubts it will ever work with him. And really… if her own mom had given up on life, had given up on Sydney, how could anyone else ever truly love her?
My ears tingled from the biting wind and swirling snow, but I stayed outside to smoke. The caseworker thought I was nuts, but I liked the cold. It numbed me… relaxed me. Besides, I couldn’t smoke inside—those were the rules.
After finishing a second cigarette, my nerves were calm. Jim pulled up in a dark Mercedes. Cool—none of my former foster families were wealthy. I met him and Lana a week ago, but not their daughter Brooke. This time the caseworker suggested placing me in a foster family with a teenage girl. As if me and Brooke would be close friends, and my senior year would be the best ever. I was smart enough to know that would never happen. My goal was to get through these last six months with the Claytons, and I’d be on my own.
The light spilled out of Jim’s car, and he opened his mouth to say something. Instead, he shook his head and laid his hand on my shoulder, guiding me inside.
“Good evening, Sydney,” he said once we reached the door.
Um, not really, Jim. Kind of crappy outside. Didn’t you notice the blizzard?
We sat down to do some paperwork, and Jim wrinkled up his nose. He must not be a smoker. I checked out the bare gray room as the caseworker shuffled through a stack of papers. Why did these meetings always take place in dark and dreary rooms? Didn’t they have enough light bulbs around here?
I have some really cool news about a contest I won. It made me whole week since I’d been dealing with the double computer virus problem. Gabriela Lessa, Brazilian editor, literary agent intern, and journalist, held a contest called The Best Future Manuscript Contest. The prize was $100 off any WIP coaching services—which are to help get/keep a writer on track. She wanted a pitch, a sample of the writing, and why you wanted help. Your ms could be at any stage, from just beginning to almost done.
I had just started a new project, Chloe—a contemporary YA novel, and had written about 8,000 words. Go here to see a little description. I am full of ideas for the beginning and middle, but I’m not sure where to go with the end.
My first idea is just to make it a life-changing story (where she grows and changes). My other idea was to tack on a little mystery that she had to solve.
That was my problem I presented. I don’t know which way to go because I’ve never written anything with a mystery angle. And although I didn’t plan on this story being a mystery exactly, the idea kind of intrigues me.
So anyways, I won the contest and am very excited. This is a great opportunity and I thought it would be something special to try. I’m not exactly sure how it’ll all go, but part of the coaching is Skype sessions to discuss the project. So next week she and I will be talking for the first time. I can’t wait.
Anyone ever done this before?
Now, back to my Lucky 7 MEME. I was tagged now several times for the Lucky 7 Meme—whatever that means (I haven’t found out yet), and was going to do this last week, but it was delayed due to computer problems. So here’s the rules.
1. Go to page 77 of your current WIP
2. Go to line 7
3. Copy down the next seven lines or paragraphs and post them written (no cheating)
4. Tag 7 authors and let them know
FROSTY (Sydney is the 17-year-old narrator)
“Hey, your haircut looks great—I never got a chance to tell you.”
Huh? I turned my head as Corbin walked away. What the hell? Corbin kept his smile until he reached his desk. He was probably trying to suck up for getting me in trouble. Asshole. What did I care about him?
“Hey, Corbin. Can you float me a twenty?” A short, stocky guy asked.
“No problem, man.” Corbin dug in his wallet and handed him the bill. “Just remember to pay me back this time. I don’t remember getting my twenty back a month ago.”
The other guy laughed, and Corbin slid his wallet in his pocket just as the bell rang. The teacher handed out the tests.
With ten minutes left to spare, I finished my test and glanced at Corbin. No way—he was cheating. He kept looking over at the desk next to him. I could tell the other guy was helping Corbin by the way he positioned his paper, and how he held his hands. Mr. Canter wasn’t paying any attention—totally oblivious, but then again, so was everyone else. Nora sat on the other side of Corbin, and not once did she glance up and see him. Corbin a cheat? Why should this surprise me? What a loser.
I’ve been going through trying to find people to tag, but most have done this already. Janet is the only one who hasn’t (I think), but everyone else has, so I’m just linking you back to theirs if you haven’t seen it.
By the way, if you’ve ever done WIP coaching with someone, I’d love to hear your experiences.